I’ll choose to take my mind back home
To this enlightened place
Where God resides and I am called
To rest within His grace,
Where lack of obligation
Brings me peace as I unwind
In the wonder of His presence
For the brain yet undefined.
The longing’s overwhelming
To return from whence I come,
At spirit’s deepest level
To unite with truth and love
Until I’m filled with ecstasy
And fear I might explode
With all that’s good and every right
Here found in God alone.
I’d wish to dwell forever here
If only it could be,
For when surrendered in this form
The mind begins to see
That God is all there is
And all that we could ever need
When faced with evil in this life
The mind can not believe.
KDC 12/08
Friday, December 12, 2008
Monday, November 24, 2008
Piggy Bank
A wise man once said... that trust is like a Piggy Bank. When a relationship begins, we are eager to fill up the bank and do things for one another that engender trust. Each time we come closer to completely trusting one another, we deposit another coin. Throughout the relationship, as it grows and ages, coins are deposited and are also removed. The initial positive balance coming from the eager first stages of the relationship should be plenty to cover any removals.
However, sometimes a betrayal is so great that the piggy bank is broken and all coins are lost. The 2 parties in the relationship must then decide whether to glue the piggy bank back together and begin again depositing coins, or to go their separate ways. The balance, though, it at zero after a major betrayal. This makes it more difficult then with a fresh relationship because it is easier to go into a deficit or negative balance of coins. It is a great committment, a difficult thing, and requires patience and endurance - but it is not impossible. After all, we know that nothing is impossible with the help of God.
However, sometimes a betrayal is so great that the piggy bank is broken and all coins are lost. The 2 parties in the relationship must then decide whether to glue the piggy bank back together and begin again depositing coins, or to go their separate ways. The balance, though, it at zero after a major betrayal. This makes it more difficult then with a fresh relationship because it is easier to go into a deficit or negative balance of coins. It is a great committment, a difficult thing, and requires patience and endurance - but it is not impossible. After all, we know that nothing is impossible with the help of God.
Monday, November 17, 2008
ESCORT
In the windswept morning
A single duck crosses ripples
On glassy pond’s surface,
Water reflecting sunlight
From farther away
Than we dare to imagine,
As far as I feel removed
At times like these.
He swims alone content,
Although lacking company,
Part of a picture
That will not last,
An image burnt into the mind of one,
The forms and colors giving rise
To moods and thoughts
For one moment’s import.
I watch and feel saddened
By his apparent missing partner,
Companion unfound
With whom to swim,
Then realize I too am alone
And haven’t regret,
For the day as my escort
Has reached me already.
A single duck crosses ripples
On glassy pond’s surface,
Water reflecting sunlight
From farther away
Than we dare to imagine,
As far as I feel removed
At times like these.
He swims alone content,
Although lacking company,
Part of a picture
That will not last,
An image burnt into the mind of one,
The forms and colors giving rise
To moods and thoughts
For one moment’s import.
I watch and feel saddened
By his apparent missing partner,
Companion unfound
With whom to swim,
Then realize I too am alone
And haven’t regret,
For the day as my escort
Has reached me already.
Sunday, November 16, 2008
The Learning Process Called Life
I was thinking about why it is that I often find myself wishing to "just be left alone"...
And what do I really mean by that? Do I really want to be left, and to be alone? Well, no - not for an extended period of time - but maybe just for a while. And does it sound as harsh to others as it sounds to me when I hear myself say it? "Leave me alone!" or "I wish you would all just leave me alone!" doesn't do much in the tact department. I feel guilty for thinking it, to be honest. But honesty is what this blog's about, and in that interest I willingly admit that I do, in fact, often want to be left alone.
So I began to think about WHY I might want to be left alone, which predominately occurs shortly after someone has begun trying to tell me how to live my life. So when another person, well meaning as they may be, tries to make a decision for me or otherwise give me advice that I never asked for, to which I feel obliged to listen - I would rather just be left alone. Basically, that makes sense.
Then WHY does it frustrate me so much when others try to give me advice or tell me what I "should" do? It angers me because I am a careful decision-maker, and I take care to think everything through before coming to a conclusion. I am not impulsive about important decisions but rather I am analytical and I ALWAYS, I mean ALWAYS, have reasons for the choices I make. On top of that, I am prepared to accept the consequences for such. So in conclusion, I believe that unsought advice insults me, condescends to me, assumes that I make decisions without thinking them through, which couldn't be farther from the truth.
Based on the above argument, I'm saying that I am angered when someone assumes something untrue about me, or considers me to be less than an authority on my own decisions. I am frustrated when I am misunderstood, especially when I am understood to be less than what I am in actuality. Yes, that's definitely the ticket.
How did I become the owner of this button for others to push? What did I witness in my formative years that made me this way? I believe it has to do with walking in another person's shoes, and this is actually the subject matter of this post. Yeah, I'm just now getting to it - are you tired of reading? I pray you are not. This is important. It is important to me, anyway.
You see, I can't assume that my ideas are important to another person because maybe they're not. Depending on the shoes they are wearing, it may not matter at all. And how can I give another person advice if I do not know where their shoes have been? Perhaps I am explaining how they can remove bubble gum from their soles, not even knowing whether they've stepped in any. How would that help them? Suppose I am sharing about how I've been dealing with the small pebble stuck inside my sneaker for years now, when they pipe up to say that they've had several sandspurs in their socks for as long as they can remember? Do you see my point? I DON'T BLOODY KNOW WHAT ANOTHER PERSON HAS BEEN THROUGH, nor what they are currently GOING through, nor what SHAPED them, nor how they THINK because I AM NOT THEM. We are all unique, different, special, worthy of listening to. Ordering you to read this post, or telling you that it is in your best interest and therefore you should partake of it doesn't make it any more or less pertinent in your own life.
How does this relate to the way that humans learn? Is this information important to the title of this post, the "Learning Process Called Life"? Of course it is, and I will explain (of course). How does a human being learn? We learn by experience, by trying things, by the things that happen to us. As babies, we learn how to get food, how to get the attention of others, how to receive love. As we grow, we continue to learn what works and what doesn't. When we try things and have disastrous results, we don't try them again. With mediocre results, we might. With positive results, we will. That's how it works until maturity starts setting in and we realize that SOME people actually might be giving us information we can count on, so that we don't have to try everything ourselves. If we trust a given information source enough, we might take their word for something instead of having to test it out. Therefore, TRUST can help us to avoid the disastrous results mentioned above in favor of learning a different way. We are still learning by experience, but now we are learning by someone else's experience!
In the previous paragraph, I made a point that I would like to reiterate. TRUST in other people can help us to avoid the disastrous results of bad choices. I have already stated that I make my life decisions carefully. Therefore, what scenario would create an atmosphere for me in which I might make a bad choice? Temptation comes to mind - that's one atmosphere in which I have lost my head in the past. Fear comes to mind - another arena in which fearing the negative response of another person caused me to choose unwisely. Pride, or an attempt to prove something also must be mentioned in this context. Certainly bad decisions are made in the attempt to prove ourselves worthy of praise or accolade or admiration or some such.
In the above statement, and this is important :-) remember :-), giving in to Temptation represents a lack of trust in God, giving in to Fear represents a lack of trust in others, and Pride demonstrates a lack of trust in ourselves. Therefore, I have proven systematically that a lack of TRUST in God, others, and ourselves can lead to bad choices. Bad choices lead to consequences and the disastrous results which keep us from trying again, and keep us from trusting anyone the next time. A lack of trust in any caring, loving relationship (whether with God or others or ourself) results in a lack of desire for the assistance of others, including unsolicited advice. And unsolicited advice leads to the desire to be "left alone".
Backwards and forwards, there's no other way to say it - TRUST MATTERS. Once we have learned NOT to trust, unlearning the reasons why and beginning to trust again requires miraculous intervention.
And what do I really mean by that? Do I really want to be left, and to be alone? Well, no - not for an extended period of time - but maybe just for a while. And does it sound as harsh to others as it sounds to me when I hear myself say it? "Leave me alone!" or "I wish you would all just leave me alone!" doesn't do much in the tact department. I feel guilty for thinking it, to be honest. But honesty is what this blog's about, and in that interest I willingly admit that I do, in fact, often want to be left alone.
So I began to think about WHY I might want to be left alone, which predominately occurs shortly after someone has begun trying to tell me how to live my life. So when another person, well meaning as they may be, tries to make a decision for me or otherwise give me advice that I never asked for, to which I feel obliged to listen - I would rather just be left alone. Basically, that makes sense.
Then WHY does it frustrate me so much when others try to give me advice or tell me what I "should" do? It angers me because I am a careful decision-maker, and I take care to think everything through before coming to a conclusion. I am not impulsive about important decisions but rather I am analytical and I ALWAYS, I mean ALWAYS, have reasons for the choices I make. On top of that, I am prepared to accept the consequences for such. So in conclusion, I believe that unsought advice insults me, condescends to me, assumes that I make decisions without thinking them through, which couldn't be farther from the truth.
Based on the above argument, I'm saying that I am angered when someone assumes something untrue about me, or considers me to be less than an authority on my own decisions. I am frustrated when I am misunderstood, especially when I am understood to be less than what I am in actuality. Yes, that's definitely the ticket.
How did I become the owner of this button for others to push? What did I witness in my formative years that made me this way? I believe it has to do with walking in another person's shoes, and this is actually the subject matter of this post. Yeah, I'm just now getting to it - are you tired of reading? I pray you are not. This is important. It is important to me, anyway.
You see, I can't assume that my ideas are important to another person because maybe they're not. Depending on the shoes they are wearing, it may not matter at all. And how can I give another person advice if I do not know where their shoes have been? Perhaps I am explaining how they can remove bubble gum from their soles, not even knowing whether they've stepped in any. How would that help them? Suppose I am sharing about how I've been dealing with the small pebble stuck inside my sneaker for years now, when they pipe up to say that they've had several sandspurs in their socks for as long as they can remember? Do you see my point? I DON'T BLOODY KNOW WHAT ANOTHER PERSON HAS BEEN THROUGH, nor what they are currently GOING through, nor what SHAPED them, nor how they THINK because I AM NOT THEM. We are all unique, different, special, worthy of listening to. Ordering you to read this post, or telling you that it is in your best interest and therefore you should partake of it doesn't make it any more or less pertinent in your own life.
How does this relate to the way that humans learn? Is this information important to the title of this post, the "Learning Process Called Life"? Of course it is, and I will explain (of course). How does a human being learn? We learn by experience, by trying things, by the things that happen to us. As babies, we learn how to get food, how to get the attention of others, how to receive love. As we grow, we continue to learn what works and what doesn't. When we try things and have disastrous results, we don't try them again. With mediocre results, we might. With positive results, we will. That's how it works until maturity starts setting in and we realize that SOME people actually might be giving us information we can count on, so that we don't have to try everything ourselves. If we trust a given information source enough, we might take their word for something instead of having to test it out. Therefore, TRUST can help us to avoid the disastrous results mentioned above in favor of learning a different way. We are still learning by experience, but now we are learning by someone else's experience!
In the previous paragraph, I made a point that I would like to reiterate. TRUST in other people can help us to avoid the disastrous results of bad choices. I have already stated that I make my life decisions carefully. Therefore, what scenario would create an atmosphere for me in which I might make a bad choice? Temptation comes to mind - that's one atmosphere in which I have lost my head in the past. Fear comes to mind - another arena in which fearing the negative response of another person caused me to choose unwisely. Pride, or an attempt to prove something also must be mentioned in this context. Certainly bad decisions are made in the attempt to prove ourselves worthy of praise or accolade or admiration or some such.
In the above statement, and this is important :-) remember :-), giving in to Temptation represents a lack of trust in God, giving in to Fear represents a lack of trust in others, and Pride demonstrates a lack of trust in ourselves. Therefore, I have proven systematically that a lack of TRUST in God, others, and ourselves can lead to bad choices. Bad choices lead to consequences and the disastrous results which keep us from trying again, and keep us from trusting anyone the next time. A lack of trust in any caring, loving relationship (whether with God or others or ourself) results in a lack of desire for the assistance of others, including unsolicited advice. And unsolicited advice leads to the desire to be "left alone".
Backwards and forwards, there's no other way to say it - TRUST MATTERS. Once we have learned NOT to trust, unlearning the reasons why and beginning to trust again requires miraculous intervention.
Saturday, November 8, 2008
Gender Analogy
As women, we tie ourselves to the fates of these men who, driven by passions and lusts, seek to prove themselves at every turn. Just like a child strapped to the back of its mother as she gathers, we are needy and dependent, having little to offer our provider save comfort and love. We whisper in the ear of the one to whom we are yoked but he doesn't always hear over the din of his ambition. We cling, hanging on for life as his conquests rise before him. Time and again he stumbles, and we pick ourselves up first, helping him to stand before climbing back into the passenger seat. The events we witness along the way might jade us, changing the way we understand this leader creature. In the end we haven't a choice but to learn to steer gently, clutch without distracting or injuring, close our eyes when in danger of offense, and make the most of our role as assistant.
KDC 11/08
KDC 11/08
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
THE THREE 'C's
A while back I heard a sermonette on the radio about the three 'C's. Like old bubble gum stuck under my desk, I kept finding this message to be waiting there when I least expected or when it was quiet enough that I reached for it. I think it has value, and I hope you'll appreciate it.
THE THREE 'C's are three words beginning with the letter 'C' that define behaviors we are to avoid... for our own good, of course.
COMPARE - Why do we insist on comparing ourselves with other people? We are each made unique, individual, special, important, and worthy of love. Nothing that we have done or could do can change these core truths. We needn't compare to others who appear more "successful" or more "wealthy" - true success and wealth are measured inside the heart.
When we compare ourselves to others, judgement always results. In the comparison of two similar entities, the goal is to label one good / one bad, one better / one lesser, one right / one wrong, one acceptable / one not so. Although our human nature leads us down the path of comparison, we must constantly resist the temptation to judge ourselves or others against any standard at all. LIVE AND LET LIVE.
COMPETE - Human nature also leads us into competition. We strive to win, to come out ahead, to prove ourselves better than others, to feel good about ourselves and our talents or skills. I submit that this is the ego talking, the part of us at the core that seeks approval and acceptance from our peers. Are we winners? Are we worthy of attention and accolade? Are we among the best? From childhood into adulthood we seek to prove our worth by elevating ourselves over others in various arenas of competition - athletics, arts, intelligence, labor, materialism. I submit that our worth lies simply in our creation, nothing more or less. God thought to make us, and thus we are worthwhile. We can rest in that truth, no competition needed. "The evil ego and the vice of pride... is there ever anything else that makes us take our different sides?"
COVET - When we want something that another person has for our own self-gratification, we are engaged in coveting. Coveting is not far from 'lusting after'. The definition of 'lust' is "wanting for one's self". I submit that anytime the word SELF is involved, we're on the wrong path. We are to constantly consider the needs of others before our own, and constantly seek to bless. It is in blessing others that we are blessed in return - not because we expected it or manipulated cirumstance to make it happen, just because it is the fruit of selflessness. Coveting someone else's possessions or blessings or talents implies that we feel we deserve what they have. We covet something simply because we want it and think we deserve to have it, in a selfish and jealous kind of way. In our materialistic, competitive (see above), selfish, corporate-based society and culture it is normal to behave this way. The world tells us to get what we can while we can, and hoard it before someone else steals it. We see evidence of covetous behavior in infidelity, theft, embezzlement, kidnapping, jealous anger, and copyright infringement. I want what is yours, and I am going to take it. I deserve it. I can't live without it. I will make it mine.
Ultimately, we are each responsible for ourselves and only ourselves. We can only affect and control our own behavior, not that of another. We are charged with striving on a daily basis to live out a life of love, considering God above all else and considering others before ourselves. The fact that this is contrary to human nature is not a surprise to God! We live in the midst of a great spiritual battle, and the enemy's goal is to keep us focused on ME.
THE THREE 'C's are three words beginning with the letter 'C' that define behaviors we are to avoid... for our own good, of course.
COMPARE - Why do we insist on comparing ourselves with other people? We are each made unique, individual, special, important, and worthy of love. Nothing that we have done or could do can change these core truths. We needn't compare to others who appear more "successful" or more "wealthy" - true success and wealth are measured inside the heart.
When we compare ourselves to others, judgement always results. In the comparison of two similar entities, the goal is to label one good / one bad, one better / one lesser, one right / one wrong, one acceptable / one not so. Although our human nature leads us down the path of comparison, we must constantly resist the temptation to judge ourselves or others against any standard at all. LIVE AND LET LIVE.
COMPETE - Human nature also leads us into competition. We strive to win, to come out ahead, to prove ourselves better than others, to feel good about ourselves and our talents or skills. I submit that this is the ego talking, the part of us at the core that seeks approval and acceptance from our peers. Are we winners? Are we worthy of attention and accolade? Are we among the best? From childhood into adulthood we seek to prove our worth by elevating ourselves over others in various arenas of competition - athletics, arts, intelligence, labor, materialism. I submit that our worth lies simply in our creation, nothing more or less. God thought to make us, and thus we are worthwhile. We can rest in that truth, no competition needed. "The evil ego and the vice of pride... is there ever anything else that makes us take our different sides?"
COVET - When we want something that another person has for our own self-gratification, we are engaged in coveting. Coveting is not far from 'lusting after'. The definition of 'lust' is "wanting for one's self". I submit that anytime the word SELF is involved, we're on the wrong path. We are to constantly consider the needs of others before our own, and constantly seek to bless. It is in blessing others that we are blessed in return - not because we expected it or manipulated cirumstance to make it happen, just because it is the fruit of selflessness. Coveting someone else's possessions or blessings or talents implies that we feel we deserve what they have. We covet something simply because we want it and think we deserve to have it, in a selfish and jealous kind of way. In our materialistic, competitive (see above), selfish, corporate-based society and culture it is normal to behave this way. The world tells us to get what we can while we can, and hoard it before someone else steals it. We see evidence of covetous behavior in infidelity, theft, embezzlement, kidnapping, jealous anger, and copyright infringement. I want what is yours, and I am going to take it. I deserve it. I can't live without it. I will make it mine.
Ultimately, we are each responsible for ourselves and only ourselves. We can only affect and control our own behavior, not that of another. We are charged with striving on a daily basis to live out a life of love, considering God above all else and considering others before ourselves. The fact that this is contrary to human nature is not a surprise to God! We live in the midst of a great spiritual battle, and the enemy's goal is to keep us focused on ME.
Monday, October 27, 2008
REMINISCENT REGRET
I’m reminded of the things I take for granted
All of the time
As I fight for balance
Prioritizing moments
Missing the most important
Then regretting choices,
Knowing there’s no going back
Or taking back either
Such a bitter pill to consume
When nothing can be done
In reversing or in changing
Things already done
KDC 10/08
All of the time
As I fight for balance
Prioritizing moments
Missing the most important
Then regretting choices,
Knowing there’s no going back
Or taking back either
Such a bitter pill to consume
When nothing can be done
In reversing or in changing
Things already done
KDC 10/08
FARTHER
The farther we dig
The more roots are found
In the silence under ground
Where nothing speaks
The farther we go
In the down direction
The tighter the roots are held
In darkest place
The farther the fruit
That falls from the tree
The more rotten and sour,
Distasteful it is
The farther we push
The buttons depressed
The less we hear the sound
Of insistent alarm
The farther we build
The wall up high still
The harder it is to tear down
And destroy forever
KDC 10/08
The more roots are found
In the silence under ground
Where nothing speaks
The farther we go
In the down direction
The tighter the roots are held
In darkest place
The farther the fruit
That falls from the tree
The more rotten and sour,
Distasteful it is
The farther we push
The buttons depressed
The less we hear the sound
Of insistent alarm
The farther we build
The wall up high still
The harder it is to tear down
And destroy forever
KDC 10/08
Saturday, October 11, 2008
HELP
Lord, please help me let them go,
These notions I’ve in mind,
To fly away upon the wind
And leave me here to find
That I need not be tied to them
As long as you are mine,
For though I cry upon their loss,
Your love runs deep and wide.
Lord, please help me look to you
When troubled to forget,
For though I know you’ve made me new
The past will hold me yet
To rote, involuntary thoughts
That turn my willing head
From seeking first to find you
In the trust that you know best.
Lord, please help me to accept
The need I have for you,
Assist me never to lament
Dependence on your truth
And if I start to think that I
Deserve the peace you won,
I pray you put me in my place
Before your throne, undone.
These notions I’ve in mind,
To fly away upon the wind
And leave me here to find
That I need not be tied to them
As long as you are mine,
For though I cry upon their loss,
Your love runs deep and wide.
Lord, please help me look to you
When troubled to forget,
For though I know you’ve made me new
The past will hold me yet
To rote, involuntary thoughts
That turn my willing head
From seeking first to find you
In the trust that you know best.
Lord, please help me to accept
The need I have for you,
Assist me never to lament
Dependence on your truth
And if I start to think that I
Deserve the peace you won,
I pray you put me in my place
Before your throne, undone.
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
C.S. Lewis QUOTES
Did you know that the C.S. stands for Clive Staples?
A man can no more diminish God's glory by refusing to worship Him than a lunatic can put out the sun by scribbling the word, 'darkness' on the walls of his cell.
Aim at heaven and you will get earth thrown in. Aim at earth and you get neither.
Christianity, if false, is of no importance, and if true, of infinite importance. The only thing it cannot be is moderately important.
Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art... It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival.
The long, dull, monotonous years of middle-aged prosperity or middle-aged adversity are excellent campaigning weather for the devil.
You don't have a soul. You are a Soul. You have a body.
C. S. Lewis
A man can no more diminish God's glory by refusing to worship Him than a lunatic can put out the sun by scribbling the word, 'darkness' on the walls of his cell.
Aim at heaven and you will get earth thrown in. Aim at earth and you get neither.
Christianity, if false, is of no importance, and if true, of infinite importance. The only thing it cannot be is moderately important.
Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art... It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival.
The long, dull, monotonous years of middle-aged prosperity or middle-aged adversity are excellent campaigning weather for the devil.
You don't have a soul. You are a Soul. You have a body.
C. S. Lewis
VICTIMS
Sometimes it’s a circumstance,
A change in life resembling chance,
Sometimes it’s a consequence,
Decisions made with no defense,
Sometimes it’s a hurtful word
Leaving scars once we’ve been burned,
Sometimes it’s a lie that’s heard,
Believed too long before we learned.
Other times we’re singled out,
Or so it seems to those in doubt,
While other times a violent act
Can leave us where we can’t relax,
Still other times we’re stricken down
By sickness as it makes its rounds,
Or other times wrong place, wrong time
We witnessed things now stuck in mind.
The truth is that some time or other
All of us are victimized,
Not one escapes this world unharmed
By pain and hurt and sin and lies.
We all could claim the reasons why,
Excuse behavior, rationalize
Behavior that does not become
The children of the Holy one.
KDC 10/08
A change in life resembling chance,
Sometimes it’s a consequence,
Decisions made with no defense,
Sometimes it’s a hurtful word
Leaving scars once we’ve been burned,
Sometimes it’s a lie that’s heard,
Believed too long before we learned.
Other times we’re singled out,
Or so it seems to those in doubt,
While other times a violent act
Can leave us where we can’t relax,
Still other times we’re stricken down
By sickness as it makes its rounds,
Or other times wrong place, wrong time
We witnessed things now stuck in mind.
The truth is that some time or other
All of us are victimized,
Not one escapes this world unharmed
By pain and hurt and sin and lies.
We all could claim the reasons why,
Excuse behavior, rationalize
Behavior that does not become
The children of the Holy one.
KDC 10/08
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
The Danger of Over-Protection
We live in a fearful world. The media and the entertainment industry feed that fear by focusing on crime, injustice, and pain more than on any goodness that might remain in the chaos of our shrinking world. Those of us who are "in the world but not of it" must struggle to maintain a positive and hopeful outlook in the midst of what occurs around us.
The response of many to the pervasive fear in our world today is often to become protective, and I dare say over-protective. We wish to protect our children, our property, our careers, our beliefs, and even ourselves from other people and their bad intentions. In an effort to protect what we perceive as "ours", we can isolate ourselves and our children from the outside world and thus maintain a false feeling of safety at least within our own families, our own homes, our controlled environment.
I submit that this is quite a dangerous prospect, and is ultimately not the healthiest way for humans to live. The fact is that we need other humans, both for social interaction and for support in times of trial and need. We also need to feel needed by others. Studies have shown that people with a wide base of support and involvement in society are happier and live longer.
Even apart from the need for sharing our lives with others, there is inherent danger in isolation due to the risk of misplacing our trust. This is perhaps the biggest issue with a fear-based outlook leading to over-protectiveness. Are we trusting in our government to protect us? Are we trusting law enforcement to protect us? Are we trusting our families or parents to protect us? Are we trusting in ourselves? In our weapons? In our escape tactics? In our knowledge and intellect? In our money? (I can not help but want to laugh out loud at these prospects...)
NONE of the entities listed above are trustworthy. I pray that this does not come as a shock to anyone reading this. Every single person, organization, tactic, and physical quality WILL let us down. It has been proven over the ages too many times to require mention. There is ONE trustworthy being in all of the universe, and ONE only. That is God, the Almighty, the Creator of everything, and He who knows the future. Only He is trustworthy and we must learn to put all of our trust in Him alone, for ONLY HE can protect us! He is above all...
Does putting our trust in God alone mean that we will no longer experience any suffering? Certainly not. He himself has told us that we will suffer in this world, especially if we openly confess our faith in Him. But ultimately, in the end, in the long run and in the only world that matters - we'll be with Him, we'll be safe, and we'll be happy. On that we can depend.
The response of many to the pervasive fear in our world today is often to become protective, and I dare say over-protective. We wish to protect our children, our property, our careers, our beliefs, and even ourselves from other people and their bad intentions. In an effort to protect what we perceive as "ours", we can isolate ourselves and our children from the outside world and thus maintain a false feeling of safety at least within our own families, our own homes, our controlled environment.
I submit that this is quite a dangerous prospect, and is ultimately not the healthiest way for humans to live. The fact is that we need other humans, both for social interaction and for support in times of trial and need. We also need to feel needed by others. Studies have shown that people with a wide base of support and involvement in society are happier and live longer.
Even apart from the need for sharing our lives with others, there is inherent danger in isolation due to the risk of misplacing our trust. This is perhaps the biggest issue with a fear-based outlook leading to over-protectiveness. Are we trusting in our government to protect us? Are we trusting law enforcement to protect us? Are we trusting our families or parents to protect us? Are we trusting in ourselves? In our weapons? In our escape tactics? In our knowledge and intellect? In our money? (I can not help but want to laugh out loud at these prospects...)
NONE of the entities listed above are trustworthy. I pray that this does not come as a shock to anyone reading this. Every single person, organization, tactic, and physical quality WILL let us down. It has been proven over the ages too many times to require mention. There is ONE trustworthy being in all of the universe, and ONE only. That is God, the Almighty, the Creator of everything, and He who knows the future. Only He is trustworthy and we must learn to put all of our trust in Him alone, for ONLY HE can protect us! He is above all...
Does putting our trust in God alone mean that we will no longer experience any suffering? Certainly not. He himself has told us that we will suffer in this world, especially if we openly confess our faith in Him. But ultimately, in the end, in the long run and in the only world that matters - we'll be with Him, we'll be safe, and we'll be happy. On that we can depend.
Monday, September 22, 2008
CONTROL ME
There was a movie out in theatres a few years back that starred Anthony Hopkins and Cuba Gooding. It was titled "INSTINCT", and the crazed character of Hopkins, a brilliant professor tainted by an experience with overseas research in the jungles of Africa, shed light on some things of which I had not previously been consciously aware. My favorite scene in the movie is when Gooding, the psychologist assigned to Hopkins' case, is forcefully held face-down on the table by his inmate client who remains shackled at the wrists. Hopkins asks his therapist repeatedly what he has lost? "WHAT HAVE YOU LOST?", he yells insistently. Gooding guesses cleverly, offering up power, choice, freedom, and control in answer to the impromptu quiz. Each time he is mistaken, his face is shoved violently against the table once again with a repeated, "NO! WHAT HAVE YOU LOST?" Finally, an idea seems to pass by Gooding's eyes as he cries out, "My illusions! I've lost my ILLUSIONS!" at which point he is immediatley released from the hold that Hopkins had on him physically. "Yes, you lost your illusions. Remember, even control is merely an illusion, boy."
What a powerful message - all is an illusion. Just as Solomon points out in the book of Ecclesiastes, all is vanity. It is all for show, all about appearances. We struggle to appear in control of our 'destiny' and our 'success'. When you really get down to it, what do we have? Our body? No, that is subject to injury, illness, and death. The body is actually very fragile. Our mind? No, also subject to attack and decay. Our life? No, that does not belong to us -nor did we make it - nor can we sustain it past the appointed time. Our time? No, for time is greatly fleeting and we fade quickly like the flowers of the field.
The truth is that we are nothing, and we have nothing that really belongs to us. Even our own lives are not our own. ALL CONTROL IS ILLUSION. We expend major amounts of energy attempting to control our environments, our relationships, our health, and how we spend our time. I must agree with Solomon categorically - it is all vanity.
What a powerful message - all is an illusion. Just as Solomon points out in the book of Ecclesiastes, all is vanity. It is all for show, all about appearances. We struggle to appear in control of our 'destiny' and our 'success'. When you really get down to it, what do we have? Our body? No, that is subject to injury, illness, and death. The body is actually very fragile. Our mind? No, also subject to attack and decay. Our life? No, that does not belong to us -nor did we make it - nor can we sustain it past the appointed time. Our time? No, for time is greatly fleeting and we fade quickly like the flowers of the field.
The truth is that we are nothing, and we have nothing that really belongs to us. Even our own lives are not our own. ALL CONTROL IS ILLUSION. We expend major amounts of energy attempting to control our environments, our relationships, our health, and how we spend our time. I must agree with Solomon categorically - it is all vanity.
Friday, September 12, 2008
SORTING
It’s a huge, fine mess
Of tangled up strings
With knots tied tight
Representing things
That caught us up
And thus enlarged
The ball of wax
Or house of cards
That’s fallen far
Below the line
That once was straight
But now defined
By twisted yarns
So that the time
To sort it out
Becomes a daunting task.
KDC 9/08
Of tangled up strings
With knots tied tight
Representing things
That caught us up
And thus enlarged
The ball of wax
Or house of cards
That’s fallen far
Below the line
That once was straight
But now defined
By twisted yarns
So that the time
To sort it out
Becomes a daunting task.
KDC 9/08
Thursday, September 11, 2008
ALL MY OWN
My troubles are my own doing,
I can not blame them on you, God.
From my decisions the dilemma comes,
For consequences match choices.
My God has no need to punish,
For the result of my own actions
Is enough to cause me pain,
I can not put the blame on you, God.
Perhaps my God is at fault
For doing nothing to save me
From these difficulties,
For leaving me to my sin?
My troubles are my own doing,
And if He saves or spares me
Then I will not learn,
My God knows this full well.
If anger overtakes me
As I suffer from my self-concern,
I’ll not direct it at my Lord
For my troubles are my own doing.
My troubles are my own doing,
I can not blame them on you, God.
From my decisions the dilemma comes,
For consequences match choices.
My God has no need to punish,
For the result of my own actions
Is enough to cause me pain,
I can not put the blame on you, God.
Perhaps my God is at fault
For doing nothing to save me
From these difficulties,
For leaving me to my sin?
My troubles are my own doing,
And if He saves or spares me
Then I will not learn,
My God knows this full well.
If anger overtakes me
As I suffer from my self-concern,
I’ll not direct it at my Lord
For my troubles are my own doing.
Monday, September 8, 2008
THE IMPORTANCE OF WORDS
They all say their lines in perfect style,
Delivering words like fountain pennies,
Heaping their cheapened utterance on tired ears
That beg for valuable silence.
No one takes them seriously anymore,
These thespians of the modern age
Who speak for the sake of filling time
With sound lest they’re forced to think.
We’re buried in a lack of meaning,
Saddened that gone is the day when art
Was all about communication,
Well-crafted and designed to impact.
If I wax poetic it is only because
I love the careful combination
Of symbols we call language,
This powerful tool for sharing ourselves.
The words existed before mankind,
Forming in the vortex of space and time
Until they could not help but create,
For words become what they define.
Delivering words like fountain pennies,
Heaping their cheapened utterance on tired ears
That beg for valuable silence.
No one takes them seriously anymore,
These thespians of the modern age
Who speak for the sake of filling time
With sound lest they’re forced to think.
We’re buried in a lack of meaning,
Saddened that gone is the day when art
Was all about communication,
Well-crafted and designed to impact.
If I wax poetic it is only because
I love the careful combination
Of symbols we call language,
This powerful tool for sharing ourselves.
The words existed before mankind,
Forming in the vortex of space and time
Until they could not help but create,
For words become what they define.
Saturday, August 30, 2008
Loving Too Much
This is a subject which I have pondered extensively, and which at first glance seems to present us with a catch 22. If our purpose in life is to love others, as God has dictated, then how could we possibly love too much? If love is entirely good, which the Word also assures, then how could more love ever be bad? Using the most common tools of rationalization, it is hard to ascertain how "too much love" could be a possibility at all.
There have been times in my life when I thought my heart would burst, when experiencing the purity of God-love for someone. This love is without thought, selfless, deeper than emotion, and painfully real. When it is experienced, time stops as we recognize the limitless power of God's art in an individual's design. It is then that we recognize the infinite nature of God, and feel humbled at our own ignorance. However, there is a very fine line between this real, divine love and its counterfeit! The counterfeit is what we know as obsession. Obsession occurs when instead of simply appreciating divine love for its existence and appearance, we begin to want it for ourselves, more and more of it, and we never want the experience of it to end.
I submit that it is, in fact, possible to love a person too much. Here I must steal a quote from (once again) the incomparable C.S. Lewis, "The Four Loves". In this work, he states...
"It is not possible to love someone too much, it is only possible that we love someone too much in comparison with our love for God."
Any of us who have identified with this question in any regard - with respect to a person, a material possession, a substance, a beloved animal, an occupation, or a child - are immediately silenced by the above statement. It is so obvious, so plain once we see it clearly in writing. Yes, it is all about the priority of our loves and the first command ever given the human race by God himself... "Love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your mind, and all your soul". The second is like unto it, "Love your neighbor as yourself". The order of these commands is paramount. FIRST, we love GOD with our whole being. THEN we are able to love others and love ourselves. If the subtle temptation to reverse the order overcomes us and we begin to love the gift more than the giver, we are loving someone or something too much in comparison with our love for God which must precede and supercede all other loves.
There have been times in my life when I thought my heart would burst, when experiencing the purity of God-love for someone. This love is without thought, selfless, deeper than emotion, and painfully real. When it is experienced, time stops as we recognize the limitless power of God's art in an individual's design. It is then that we recognize the infinite nature of God, and feel humbled at our own ignorance. However, there is a very fine line between this real, divine love and its counterfeit! The counterfeit is what we know as obsession. Obsession occurs when instead of simply appreciating divine love for its existence and appearance, we begin to want it for ourselves, more and more of it, and we never want the experience of it to end.
I submit that it is, in fact, possible to love a person too much. Here I must steal a quote from (once again) the incomparable C.S. Lewis, "The Four Loves". In this work, he states...
"It is not possible to love someone too much, it is only possible that we love someone too much in comparison with our love for God."
Any of us who have identified with this question in any regard - with respect to a person, a material possession, a substance, a beloved animal, an occupation, or a child - are immediately silenced by the above statement. It is so obvious, so plain once we see it clearly in writing. Yes, it is all about the priority of our loves and the first command ever given the human race by God himself... "Love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your mind, and all your soul". The second is like unto it, "Love your neighbor as yourself". The order of these commands is paramount. FIRST, we love GOD with our whole being. THEN we are able to love others and love ourselves. If the subtle temptation to reverse the order overcomes us and we begin to love the gift more than the giver, we are loving someone or something too much in comparison with our love for God which must precede and supercede all other loves.
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Monday, August 18, 2008
NOTHING LIKE YOU
You’ve tried so hard
But we keep messing up
Because it’s what we do best,
Taking what’s perfect
And making it “better”,
Avoiding the need to confess.
You’ve called and drawn
The worst of us towards you
Because you love us that much,
But we find our ways
To go it alone again,
Still shying away from your touch.
You’ve saved us from
The curse of selfishness
Over and over in time,
Yet here we are fighting
For personal ground,
Unable to see down the line.
You’ve given your all
And spared not your son
That we might have rest for our souls,
But we don’t believe
In a truly good being,
Assuming we lack as a whole.
You’ve opened the gates
To let mercy flow down
On us who are nothing like you,
Convinced we’re the rulers
Of our destiny
And right to invent our own truth.
You are ever patient,
Slowest to anger,
Filled with compassion for us,
Although we rebel
And insist we know better,
You look on us always in love.
KDC 8/08
But we keep messing up
Because it’s what we do best,
Taking what’s perfect
And making it “better”,
Avoiding the need to confess.
You’ve called and drawn
The worst of us towards you
Because you love us that much,
But we find our ways
To go it alone again,
Still shying away from your touch.
You’ve saved us from
The curse of selfishness
Over and over in time,
Yet here we are fighting
For personal ground,
Unable to see down the line.
You’ve given your all
And spared not your son
That we might have rest for our souls,
But we don’t believe
In a truly good being,
Assuming we lack as a whole.
You’ve opened the gates
To let mercy flow down
On us who are nothing like you,
Convinced we’re the rulers
Of our destiny
And right to invent our own truth.
You are ever patient,
Slowest to anger,
Filled with compassion for us,
Although we rebel
And insist we know better,
You look on us always in love.
KDC 8/08
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
"FREE" WILL
Let's take a look at the subject of free will. To quote my favorite author of the 20th century, C.S. Lewis, "God gave us free will in order that we might love. Without the choice to love, we are merely robots. Love that is commanded or executed by some higher force is no love at all." Who can dispute this argument? I certainly can not. Love, by its nature, involves placing the object of the love above oneself. That is difficult for most, impossible for some. But beyond the implications that free will has towards the subject of love, what about its general purpose and use? Is Free Will really free? I propose that it is not. Free will is an illusion, for every choice that we make has consequence. We are free to make choices of our own volition and will, yes. However, those choices always affect the lives of others, for no man is an island (to quote another famous author).
For example, suppose that I choose to exert my free will in drinking alcohol. I choose to imbibe regular copious amounts of it until I am entrenched in the habit of becoming intoxicated. Is there anything to stop me from doing so? No, for I have free will. However, the consequence of these actions to my family, friends, and even total strangers might be quite dire. My health would surely deteriorate, my judgement become clouded, my motivation lax, and my motor skills slowed. The repercussions of my drunkeness would continue into the far reaches of my life like circles on the water into which a pebble has been thrown. My "free will" therefore, is not free at all, for it is inherently tied to the lives of others. If we love others, then we consider them before ourselves. Therefore, my will must be bent toward what is best for those that I love.
This is the crux of the argument, the bending of the will. Truly the only choice that we actually have is in what direction to bend it, correct? We might choose to bend our will toward selfishness, toward obsession, toward work, toward intellect, toward the approval of others, or toward God. The latter is the only appropriate choice, since only God's will is superior to our own. If we consciously choose to bend our will toward God's, using the freedom that we have to choose what is best and most right according to our conscience, then we have directed our choices in the most altruistic manner possible. Only in this scenario is the free will used to influence others in good ways instead of bad.
The exercising of the will is likened to any other form of exercise - it must be enacted over and over again in order to be in good shape, as we call it. Our will is accustomed to fighting, to having its way, to satisfying and gratifying the desires of the flesh. The more we bend it toward the will of God, the more it is accustomed to doing so. The more we bend it toward the needs of self, the more it is accustomed to doing so. The muscle of the "free" will is exercised any time we make choices that are of import to the lives of others.
I submit that the choices detailed above are the most crucially important in any human life. Which way will your will bend?
For example, suppose that I choose to exert my free will in drinking alcohol. I choose to imbibe regular copious amounts of it until I am entrenched in the habit of becoming intoxicated. Is there anything to stop me from doing so? No, for I have free will. However, the consequence of these actions to my family, friends, and even total strangers might be quite dire. My health would surely deteriorate, my judgement become clouded, my motivation lax, and my motor skills slowed. The repercussions of my drunkeness would continue into the far reaches of my life like circles on the water into which a pebble has been thrown. My "free will" therefore, is not free at all, for it is inherently tied to the lives of others. If we love others, then we consider them before ourselves. Therefore, my will must be bent toward what is best for those that I love.
This is the crux of the argument, the bending of the will. Truly the only choice that we actually have is in what direction to bend it, correct? We might choose to bend our will toward selfishness, toward obsession, toward work, toward intellect, toward the approval of others, or toward God. The latter is the only appropriate choice, since only God's will is superior to our own. If we consciously choose to bend our will toward God's, using the freedom that we have to choose what is best and most right according to our conscience, then we have directed our choices in the most altruistic manner possible. Only in this scenario is the free will used to influence others in good ways instead of bad.
The exercising of the will is likened to any other form of exercise - it must be enacted over and over again in order to be in good shape, as we call it. Our will is accustomed to fighting, to having its way, to satisfying and gratifying the desires of the flesh. The more we bend it toward the will of God, the more it is accustomed to doing so. The more we bend it toward the needs of self, the more it is accustomed to doing so. The muscle of the "free" will is exercised any time we make choices that are of import to the lives of others.
I submit that the choices detailed above are the most crucially important in any human life. Which way will your will bend?
Friday, July 11, 2008
Is Anyone truly Surrendered?
The White Flag
Surrender comes in many colors
Like the blue of fallen dreams
Bordered ‘round the hazy yellows
Where illusion used to be
In solid purple ‘gainst the gold
That was control’s majestic beat
Marching next to independence,
Red and brazen inside me.
Behold the grayness under choices
Fitting pieces perfectly
‘Til over blackness there’s a portrait
Dressed in humble subtlety
And waiting for the narrow brush
To detail where the white should be
A banner waving dawn to dusk
Proclaiming what we know as free.
KDC 7/08
Surrender comes in many colors
Like the blue of fallen dreams
Bordered ‘round the hazy yellows
Where illusion used to be
In solid purple ‘gainst the gold
That was control’s majestic beat
Marching next to independence,
Red and brazen inside me.
Behold the grayness under choices
Fitting pieces perfectly
‘Til over blackness there’s a portrait
Dressed in humble subtlety
And waiting for the narrow brush
To detail where the white should be
A banner waving dawn to dusk
Proclaiming what we know as free.
KDC 7/08
Tuesday, July 1, 2008
Ever Wonder?
THE MEANING
What does it mean for the heart to open,
When memory’s flood reappears,
Where does it take us to places forgotten,
And how can we see it all clear?
Whenever we look straight into the sunlight
It’s blinding to one who is not prepared
But when we are ready to see what it shines on
True lessons are learned from what’s there.
Relationships past and long since unbidden
Are coming to mind and exposed in the heart
Teaching me why I was there in the first place
And truths they were meant to impart.
The spirits of people I loved in this lifetime
Will always remain close at hand
And recalling their laughter, their touch,
Or their eyes brings back what we couldn’t have planned.
What does it mean to love one another
The way that the Lord has loved us?
Isn’t there surely a permanent marker
On souls that have empathized much?
I praise the artist in heaven above
For finally drawing my heart
Out of its shelter that served as a prison
And kept us all trapped in the dark.
What does it mean for the heart to open,
When memory’s flood reappears,
Where does it take us to places forgotten,
And how can we see it all clear?
Whenever we look straight into the sunlight
It’s blinding to one who is not prepared
But when we are ready to see what it shines on
True lessons are learned from what’s there.
Relationships past and long since unbidden
Are coming to mind and exposed in the heart
Teaching me why I was there in the first place
And truths they were meant to impart.
The spirits of people I loved in this lifetime
Will always remain close at hand
And recalling their laughter, their touch,
Or their eyes brings back what we couldn’t have planned.
What does it mean to love one another
The way that the Lord has loved us?
Isn’t there surely a permanent marker
On souls that have empathized much?
I praise the artist in heaven above
For finally drawing my heart
Out of its shelter that served as a prison
And kept us all trapped in the dark.
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
The Way we Are
THE BOX
I’d settle you inside a box,
Attach a heavy safety lock,
Sure to lose the key in time
I’d give up hope and never find
A way to take you out again
To trust in how the heart can mend.
I trapped you like you said I would,
Assumed that you were far from good,
For I had made the worst mistake
In trusting you to help me make
The most of what I came to need
Beyond the time it took to grieve.
I never could have guessed that you
Would not conform to who I knew
When once we promised it would last
Although it happened far too fast
For one as insecure as I
In terms of how we made love die.
If it were not for greater good
You’d still be there misunderstood
And I would be consumed with fear
Not knowing change was real and near
Unlocked within surrender’s prize
Released by Him who can not lie.
KDC 6/08
I’d settle you inside a box,
Attach a heavy safety lock,
Sure to lose the key in time
I’d give up hope and never find
A way to take you out again
To trust in how the heart can mend.
I trapped you like you said I would,
Assumed that you were far from good,
For I had made the worst mistake
In trusting you to help me make
The most of what I came to need
Beyond the time it took to grieve.
I never could have guessed that you
Would not conform to who I knew
When once we promised it would last
Although it happened far too fast
For one as insecure as I
In terms of how we made love die.
If it were not for greater good
You’d still be there misunderstood
And I would be consumed with fear
Not knowing change was real and near
Unlocked within surrender’s prize
Released by Him who can not lie.
KDC 6/08
Thursday, June 5, 2008
Where I Go
Within the numbers there's no pain
But simple right or wrong
The black of symbols on white page
A clean and noble place to hide
From uttered words that, lacking care,
Scatter towards a target
Long since gone and buried,
Lost in computation fair.
But simple right or wrong
The black of symbols on white page
A clean and noble place to hide
From uttered words that, lacking care,
Scatter towards a target
Long since gone and buried,
Lost in computation fair.
Friday, May 9, 2008
EDEN GONE
He doesn’t protect us from hurting ourselves,
He will not prevent us from falling,
He lets us experience great torrents of pain
All in the name of His calling.
We’re caught unaware of the powerful danger
Until we are already trapped as its prey
And yet we remain so naïve to the changes
Occurring to force our perceptions astray.
We hear that he loves us apart from condition
And knows no boundary He can not leap,
But something refuses to calculate cleanly
In minds that were left in the void of belief.
All that we know to be real and distorted
Regarding existence in Eden’s black stain
Defies what we want to believe at our center,
That punishment isn’t the reason for pain.
KDC 4/08
He will not prevent us from falling,
He lets us experience great torrents of pain
All in the name of His calling.
We’re caught unaware of the powerful danger
Until we are already trapped as its prey
And yet we remain so naïve to the changes
Occurring to force our perceptions astray.
We hear that he loves us apart from condition
And knows no boundary He can not leap,
But something refuses to calculate cleanly
In minds that were left in the void of belief.
All that we know to be real and distorted
Regarding existence in Eden’s black stain
Defies what we want to believe at our center,
That punishment isn’t the reason for pain.
KDC 4/08
Saturday, April 19, 2008
Investment
I have a theory about relationships that I am working on and thought I'd share the rudimentary beginnings with you all. It involved the comparison of relationships with financial investments. Granted, this sounds somewhat cold and uninteresting. However, there are some useful and insightful parallels that make sense to look at, I believe.
I would like to look at 4 FACTORS that influence or determine the ROI, otherwise known as the Return on Investment. Later on, or in another post, we'll look at the big picture and the spiritual implications of each factor.
Factor #1 - TERM
The first factor that we must consider in determining our return/harvest/payoff/reaping is the TERM of the investment, i.e. how long we choose to invest in it. We are all aware of the impact of long-lasting relationships over shorter ones, and the payoff from sticking it out with a person through thick and thin, easy and hard, good and bad. Memories are created, bonds grow stronger (pun intended), roots penetrate deeper into each soul involved. If I choose to give up on an investment entirely and stop sowing into it, my return is obviously sacrificed. Long term investments are known to be the safest, surest, and most productive types.
Factor #2 - PERCENTAGE
This factor represents the amount of our resources dedicated to the investment, as a percentage of the total available. In relationship, we are investing a certain percentage/portion/part/fraction of our very self and our life. There are rules that we should follow in determining how much of ourselves to invest in a given relationship. For instance, our relationship with God is automatically to be the largest investment of time and energy. Our relationship with our spouse should be invested in moreso that into other relationships such as friends, children, or co-workers.
Factor #3 - RISK
As with any investment, the amount of risk we take is directly proportional to the potential payoff. In other words, the more we open ourselves up to take a loss, the more we are also open to be greatly blessed with reward. It is difficult for many people to accept the vulnerability required to create the give and take/sow and reap dynamic that most of us desire. We want the great payoff, the major ROI, but often do not want to take the necessary relational risk to acheive it.
Factor # 4 - Much Is Beyond our Control
When discussing financial planning and ROI and risky vs. conservative investing, we must consider that many of the factors influencing the harvest are beyond our control. This is like a as a farmer's return on his crop that is largely affected by weather (uncontrollable), bugs (largely uncontrollable), seed quality (largely uncontrollable), and market price (uncontrollable). In relational investment, the free will of the other individual, circumstance beyond our control, temptation of either party, patience of either part, and so on - are all beyond our control. The most we can do is to be wise with our sowing, but the reaping is never guaranteed.
I would like to look at 4 FACTORS that influence or determine the ROI, otherwise known as the Return on Investment. Later on, or in another post, we'll look at the big picture and the spiritual implications of each factor.
Factor #1 - TERM
The first factor that we must consider in determining our return/harvest/payoff/reaping is the TERM of the investment, i.e. how long we choose to invest in it. We are all aware of the impact of long-lasting relationships over shorter ones, and the payoff from sticking it out with a person through thick and thin, easy and hard, good and bad. Memories are created, bonds grow stronger (pun intended), roots penetrate deeper into each soul involved. If I choose to give up on an investment entirely and stop sowing into it, my return is obviously sacrificed. Long term investments are known to be the safest, surest, and most productive types.
Factor #2 - PERCENTAGE
This factor represents the amount of our resources dedicated to the investment, as a percentage of the total available. In relationship, we are investing a certain percentage/portion/part/fraction of our very self and our life. There are rules that we should follow in determining how much of ourselves to invest in a given relationship. For instance, our relationship with God is automatically to be the largest investment of time and energy. Our relationship with our spouse should be invested in moreso that into other relationships such as friends, children, or co-workers.
Factor #3 - RISK
As with any investment, the amount of risk we take is directly proportional to the potential payoff. In other words, the more we open ourselves up to take a loss, the more we are also open to be greatly blessed with reward. It is difficult for many people to accept the vulnerability required to create the give and take/sow and reap dynamic that most of us desire. We want the great payoff, the major ROI, but often do not want to take the necessary relational risk to acheive it.
Factor # 4 - Much Is Beyond our Control
When discussing financial planning and ROI and risky vs. conservative investing, we must consider that many of the factors influencing the harvest are beyond our control. This is like a as a farmer's return on his crop that is largely affected by weather (uncontrollable), bugs (largely uncontrollable), seed quality (largely uncontrollable), and market price (uncontrollable). In relational investment, the free will of the other individual, circumstance beyond our control, temptation of either party, patience of either part, and so on - are all beyond our control. The most we can do is to be wise with our sowing, but the reaping is never guaranteed.
Thursday, March 27, 2008
A different kind of poem...
AROUND
Towards a tree the dog pulls
Old lady holding its leash
Around
Intent on darting squirrel
One of many in like kind
Around
The waters that glisten
For all at sunken lake’s edge
Around
Walker’s path now crowded
As the sounds of day arise
Around
The moist and tepid air
In the morning we can breathe;
Around
Goes the clock ticking hours
And the year passing seasons
Around
To well-worn holidays
And birth dates we know by heart
Around
The cycles of living;
In time we learn that all comes
Around.
Towards a tree the dog pulls
Old lady holding its leash
Around
Intent on darting squirrel
One of many in like kind
Around
The waters that glisten
For all at sunken lake’s edge
Around
Walker’s path now crowded
As the sounds of day arise
Around
The moist and tepid air
In the morning we can breathe;
Around
Goes the clock ticking hours
And the year passing seasons
Around
To well-worn holidays
And birth dates we know by heart
Around
The cycles of living;
In time we learn that all comes
Around.
Friday, March 21, 2008
In Case we wonder...
SMALLNESS
My Lord, my God, my King,
What am I before you?
A fraction of the world of clay
You mold within your mighty hands?
A single soldier in armies vast,
Assembled over all of time?
One tiny flower amidst the acres
Blooming wild in the sun of your making?
A colorful fish in a school of millions
Within the giant ocean’s deep?
Or a beautiful shell, buried in sand,
As yet undiscovered on miles of coast?
Lone bird on the wing in a sky full of danger
Lost in a cloud of all others that fly?
A fading ripple upon the waters
Defining existence in physical terms?
Yet none of this vanity matters,
The answers to hypothetical questions,
For your ways are beyond tracing out,
More complex than we could fathom,
A force over which we stumble,
In minds of your own making.
As creations of a maker we only hope to know
In spirit and truth, based on telling words, ancient,
We trust not in what we can see with vision,
For our sight is narrow, our thoughts confined,
The works of our hands pathetic attempts
At mimicry such as a child for its parent,
Following the only leader he can imagine
And trusting implicitly the father’s wisdom -
Not only in teaching the lessons of life
But in caring for the naive child,
Reaching, needing, asking, seeking love.
My Lord, my God, my King,
What am I before you?
A fraction of the world of clay
You mold within your mighty hands?
A single soldier in armies vast,
Assembled over all of time?
One tiny flower amidst the acres
Blooming wild in the sun of your making?
A colorful fish in a school of millions
Within the giant ocean’s deep?
Or a beautiful shell, buried in sand,
As yet undiscovered on miles of coast?
Lone bird on the wing in a sky full of danger
Lost in a cloud of all others that fly?
A fading ripple upon the waters
Defining existence in physical terms?
Yet none of this vanity matters,
The answers to hypothetical questions,
For your ways are beyond tracing out,
More complex than we could fathom,
A force over which we stumble,
In minds of your own making.
As creations of a maker we only hope to know
In spirit and truth, based on telling words, ancient,
We trust not in what we can see with vision,
For our sight is narrow, our thoughts confined,
The works of our hands pathetic attempts
At mimicry such as a child for its parent,
Following the only leader he can imagine
And trusting implicitly the father’s wisdom -
Not only in teaching the lessons of life
But in caring for the naive child,
Reaching, needing, asking, seeking love.
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
Friday, March 7, 2008
More Poetry
The Land of the Living
In the land of the living
We all choose to die
For the bodies we live in
Do not give us life,
As hearts become battered
Our hands become tied
Behind backs that are broken
And minds full of lies
That see what they want to
Without open eyes
And, hearing the bell toll,
Grow fearful of time.
In the realm of occurrence
We’re barely alive,
Clinging to history
By which we’re defined
And deaf to the whisper
From deep down inside,
Reaching to surface
The suffering tide
Of rampant emotion
To gently remind
That under the current
Still insight resides.
In the kingdom of spirit
We ought to arrive
After seeking for naught
But the strength to survive
Until we are broken
By forces maligned
And beg just to feel
The relief we can’t find
From sources external -
The more that we try,
One way becomes clearer
In whom to abide.
In the land of the living
We all choose to die
For the bodies we live in
Do not give us life,
As hearts become battered
Our hands become tied
Behind backs that are broken
And minds full of lies
That see what they want to
Without open eyes
And, hearing the bell toll,
Grow fearful of time.
In the realm of occurrence
We’re barely alive,
Clinging to history
By which we’re defined
And deaf to the whisper
From deep down inside,
Reaching to surface
The suffering tide
Of rampant emotion
To gently remind
That under the current
Still insight resides.
In the kingdom of spirit
We ought to arrive
After seeking for naught
But the strength to survive
Until we are broken
By forces maligned
And beg just to feel
The relief we can’t find
From sources external -
The more that we try,
One way becomes clearer
In whom to abide.
Thursday, March 6, 2008
At the Time of Death
At times I have thought about dying and how much easier it would be than living. That is why suicide is such a cop-out, such a coward's way to go. Not that it wouldn't be romantic and a powerful statement to make, like shouting to the world, "I Hate You!" or like saying to everyone who has ever hurt us, "See what you've done?" Still, something inside of me doesn't want to give them the satisfaction. And what about all of the good people, the ones who try NOT to hurt others, who die unexpectedly, tragically? What a slap in the face to all of them. In an encounter with the REAL prospect of death, it certainly must lose its appeal. In the face of anonimity, would not all of us struggle to hold onto the only life we've ever known, the only reality we've been offered?
There is so much pain in this life - not just my own, but in general. It is all around us - on the news, in the food chain, between lovers, and in hospitals full of those wanting another chance to feel its sting. Physical pain pales compared with being lost forever, gone from a world we have yet to figure out. So we, the living, struggle to make sense of it all, yearn for a sign that we are important, that we make a difference, that our presence somehow shifts the balance ever so slightly toward good.
As we age, people come and go from our lives, some temporarily and others forever, each moving on to their own unique destiny. The ones who have died to this world can't tell us the secrets we so long to know, and we cannot benefit from their after-life wisdom, nor their familiar impact on our now-emptier existence. It is not their connection that we miss, but the possibility of it, like when an old friend looks us up after years of silence or we catch sight of them at a public gathering and remembrance ensues.
None of us realize how short it is, this time we've been given. Otherwise it wouldn't be so hard to love the ones with whom we share life. In full awareness of what we could be missing, we would treasure the moments together and forget the reasons why we argue, why we separate from one another, why we succumb to the demands of a horribly corrupt world. We see evidence of this when faced with a loved one's demise; nothing matters compared with drinking in the final hours alongside them, creating as many memories as possible before the potential retreats. We put aside work, schedules, and other relationships just for a little more time with the soon-to-be-departed, sacrificing even sanity to hold the hand that still promises warmth, to look into the knowing eyes and engrave them into a memory also fleeting.
Is this not the best we humans have to offer, the death-bed kind of love that forgives all and manufactures time for sharing ourselves? It is transforming, impactful, meaningful, necessary. Time itself is suspended in a dream-like state of belief and disbelief. Belief that there is hope, that miracles happen and people survive against all odds. Disbelief that we ever take for granted the privilege of spending time with another soul.
When all of existence shrinks into the tiny bubble surrounding the family in grief, the importance of the moment becomes clear. The last of these are cherished and desperate as we covet one final opportunity for communication and understanding. The definition of life as measured on the linear scale of time becomes painfully clear and the hope in an afterlife of peace essential.
There is so much pain in this life - not just my own, but in general. It is all around us - on the news, in the food chain, between lovers, and in hospitals full of those wanting another chance to feel its sting. Physical pain pales compared with being lost forever, gone from a world we have yet to figure out. So we, the living, struggle to make sense of it all, yearn for a sign that we are important, that we make a difference, that our presence somehow shifts the balance ever so slightly toward good.
As we age, people come and go from our lives, some temporarily and others forever, each moving on to their own unique destiny. The ones who have died to this world can't tell us the secrets we so long to know, and we cannot benefit from their after-life wisdom, nor their familiar impact on our now-emptier existence. It is not their connection that we miss, but the possibility of it, like when an old friend looks us up after years of silence or we catch sight of them at a public gathering and remembrance ensues.
None of us realize how short it is, this time we've been given. Otherwise it wouldn't be so hard to love the ones with whom we share life. In full awareness of what we could be missing, we would treasure the moments together and forget the reasons why we argue, why we separate from one another, why we succumb to the demands of a horribly corrupt world. We see evidence of this when faced with a loved one's demise; nothing matters compared with drinking in the final hours alongside them, creating as many memories as possible before the potential retreats. We put aside work, schedules, and other relationships just for a little more time with the soon-to-be-departed, sacrificing even sanity to hold the hand that still promises warmth, to look into the knowing eyes and engrave them into a memory also fleeting.
Is this not the best we humans have to offer, the death-bed kind of love that forgives all and manufactures time for sharing ourselves? It is transforming, impactful, meaningful, necessary. Time itself is suspended in a dream-like state of belief and disbelief. Belief that there is hope, that miracles happen and people survive against all odds. Disbelief that we ever take for granted the privilege of spending time with another soul.
When all of existence shrinks into the tiny bubble surrounding the family in grief, the importance of the moment becomes clear. The last of these are cherished and desperate as we covet one final opportunity for communication and understanding. The definition of life as measured on the linear scale of time becomes painfully clear and the hope in an afterlife of peace essential.
Monday, March 3, 2008
Willful Bondage (or Freedom Continued...)
Continuing in the freedom from fear, the freedom to be who we were made to be without the fear of others' reactions or judgements, requires courage and perseverance. Why? It would seem to be ridiculous, preposterous, almost unthinkable that we would bend our will against our own freedom. However, here I propose a reasoned approach in answer to the question of why we will ourselves into continued bondage to fear.
First of all, we are brought up and taught from an early age to be fearful. Our mothers (bless them, for they know not what they do) instill in us the fear of physical injury, the fear of failure in school or other endeavor, the fear of rejection from her or from others. We are to do our best to be successful, to be likeable, to be safe. We fear the consequences of doing otherwise. As a child, love, approval, and acceptance are our constant motivators.
Second, the world teaches us to fear other humans. We learn early on that some people are mean, dangerous, uncaring, violent, and selfish. We learn that there are people to fear. We doubt the goodness that we once believed all people to contain in their hearts.
Lastly, we fear the unknown. This is the predominant fear of the adult who finds personal freedom only to return to the bondage of living on the run, always searching and never finding the safety that is available by choice. It is a cruel irony that our own choices result in slavery versus freedom, and that the inner peace and expansion we desire is there for the taking all along. The Lord holds it out to us on a silver platter, begging us to trust him and eat of it. We too often push the plate away, denying ourselves the gift of release.
We often read or hear the story of the Israelites after they were led out of slavery in Egypt by Moses and Aaron. We laugh at their wandering in the desert for 40 years, we question their desire to return to Egypt after all that God has done for them, we show disgust for their murmuring and grumbling against the gifts of God. Is this not a mirror of our own behavior? Are we also not inclined to rely on our former lifestyle of fear because it is what we have known?
I propose that the greatest temptation to return to bondage lies with familiarity. We are creatures of habit, enjoying what we know versus what we do not, and seeking well-defined limitations versus the responsibility of unlimited choice. Ofcourse, a dicussion on free will could ensue, and would be appropriate in this context. However, we have gone far enough in understanding the behavior of our ancestors, the early Jews. While they lived among the Egyptians, who enslaved them and treated them harshly, they had the security of knowing that their needs were met. They always had food, always had shelter, always knew what the day would bring. They knew what was expected of them, and had little choice in how their time would be spent. They led well-directed, even orchestrated lives. The confinement of slavery was appealing in its simplicity and familiarity.
In closing, let us ponder the gift of freedom from limitation and the responsibility it brings. In return for bending our free will towards the purposes of God, surrendering our lives to His control, and suppressing the fear of the unknown in favor of embracing its wonder, we are given the freedom to be the complex, unlimited beings He has made us to be. In return for trusting in His ultimate and faithful goodness, His care for us as His children, His plans for our life (over and above our own - ouch!), and His knowledge of what is best for us (over and above our own - ouch!) we are given the ultimate in freedom! This is the freedom to care ONLY about what God thinks, about only HIS judgement of us, and to pursue the life He lays out in our spirits. All striving, all doubt, all opinion of man is cast away. In place of allowing our lives to be defined by other humans, we live a life defined by our Creator and the lover of our souls. Hallelujah.
First of all, we are brought up and taught from an early age to be fearful. Our mothers (bless them, for they know not what they do) instill in us the fear of physical injury, the fear of failure in school or other endeavor, the fear of rejection from her or from others. We are to do our best to be successful, to be likeable, to be safe. We fear the consequences of doing otherwise. As a child, love, approval, and acceptance are our constant motivators.
Second, the world teaches us to fear other humans. We learn early on that some people are mean, dangerous, uncaring, violent, and selfish. We learn that there are people to fear. We doubt the goodness that we once believed all people to contain in their hearts.
Lastly, we fear the unknown. This is the predominant fear of the adult who finds personal freedom only to return to the bondage of living on the run, always searching and never finding the safety that is available by choice. It is a cruel irony that our own choices result in slavery versus freedom, and that the inner peace and expansion we desire is there for the taking all along. The Lord holds it out to us on a silver platter, begging us to trust him and eat of it. We too often push the plate away, denying ourselves the gift of release.
We often read or hear the story of the Israelites after they were led out of slavery in Egypt by Moses and Aaron. We laugh at their wandering in the desert for 40 years, we question their desire to return to Egypt after all that God has done for them, we show disgust for their murmuring and grumbling against the gifts of God. Is this not a mirror of our own behavior? Are we also not inclined to rely on our former lifestyle of fear because it is what we have known?
I propose that the greatest temptation to return to bondage lies with familiarity. We are creatures of habit, enjoying what we know versus what we do not, and seeking well-defined limitations versus the responsibility of unlimited choice. Ofcourse, a dicussion on free will could ensue, and would be appropriate in this context. However, we have gone far enough in understanding the behavior of our ancestors, the early Jews. While they lived among the Egyptians, who enslaved them and treated them harshly, they had the security of knowing that their needs were met. They always had food, always had shelter, always knew what the day would bring. They knew what was expected of them, and had little choice in how their time would be spent. They led well-directed, even orchestrated lives. The confinement of slavery was appealing in its simplicity and familiarity.
In closing, let us ponder the gift of freedom from limitation and the responsibility it brings. In return for bending our free will towards the purposes of God, surrendering our lives to His control, and suppressing the fear of the unknown in favor of embracing its wonder, we are given the freedom to be the complex, unlimited beings He has made us to be. In return for trusting in His ultimate and faithful goodness, His care for us as His children, His plans for our life (over and above our own - ouch!), and His knowledge of what is best for us (over and above our own - ouch!) we are given the ultimate in freedom! This is the freedom to care ONLY about what God thinks, about only HIS judgement of us, and to pursue the life He lays out in our spirits. All striving, all doubt, all opinion of man is cast away. In place of allowing our lives to be defined by other humans, we live a life defined by our Creator and the lover of our souls. Hallelujah.
Monday, February 25, 2008
FREEDOM DEFINED
What is FREEDOM?
We hear this word used a lot, both in our personal culture and in terms of our nationality. I thought a lot about freedom, and what its meaning truly is. The Bible states that "the truth will set you free", and I wanted to define that state of freedom.
It may seem obvious that this freedom does not entitle us to do whatever we want. However, is that not what modern culture asserts? Freedom is being able to buy a motorcyle and ride cross-country, eat a half gallon of ice cream at midnight, or go out on the town at will. It is the freedom to do our OWN WILL, is it not?
An immature individual seeks that kind of freedom, but it soon grows unsatisfactory. The reason is that just because we CAN do something does not mean that we SHOULD do it. Where is the conscience, the self-restraint, the responsibility? We must exert our will to choose NOT to do those things which would harm us or others, and to choose TO do those things which would benefit the most people, perhaps but not necessarily including ourselves.
I do not believe that real freedom has one iota to do with action. Although freedom of religion, freedom of speech, freedom from discrimination, and freedom to vote are all wonderful and worthwhile things, we must go even further into the meaning of freedom.
TRUE FREEDOM IS FREEDOM FROM FEAR
What we are really saying above is that we should not have to FEAR speaking our minds, we should not have to FEAR worshipping in the way we choose, we should not have to FEAR not having a say in our government, we should not have to FEAR being discriminated against.
Personally, this important law still holds true. When we are truly free spirits, we do not fear man. We fear nothing that another person might do to hurt or harm us, in any way. We understand that God will take care of us and that the next life is better than the current one. We put our trust in that which is OUTSIDE of this world, OTHER than what we can see, and ABOVE all else.
The truth does set us free, and gives us the peace that we need to live without fear. Any freedom which falls short of this goal in a day and time when so many people live their lives in fear is not freedom at all, but bondage.
We hear this word used a lot, both in our personal culture and in terms of our nationality. I thought a lot about freedom, and what its meaning truly is. The Bible states that "the truth will set you free", and I wanted to define that state of freedom.
It may seem obvious that this freedom does not entitle us to do whatever we want. However, is that not what modern culture asserts? Freedom is being able to buy a motorcyle and ride cross-country, eat a half gallon of ice cream at midnight, or go out on the town at will. It is the freedom to do our OWN WILL, is it not?
An immature individual seeks that kind of freedom, but it soon grows unsatisfactory. The reason is that just because we CAN do something does not mean that we SHOULD do it. Where is the conscience, the self-restraint, the responsibility? We must exert our will to choose NOT to do those things which would harm us or others, and to choose TO do those things which would benefit the most people, perhaps but not necessarily including ourselves.
I do not believe that real freedom has one iota to do with action. Although freedom of religion, freedom of speech, freedom from discrimination, and freedom to vote are all wonderful and worthwhile things, we must go even further into the meaning of freedom.
TRUE FREEDOM IS FREEDOM FROM FEAR
What we are really saying above is that we should not have to FEAR speaking our minds, we should not have to FEAR worshipping in the way we choose, we should not have to FEAR not having a say in our government, we should not have to FEAR being discriminated against.
Personally, this important law still holds true. When we are truly free spirits, we do not fear man. We fear nothing that another person might do to hurt or harm us, in any way. We understand that God will take care of us and that the next life is better than the current one. We put our trust in that which is OUTSIDE of this world, OTHER than what we can see, and ABOVE all else.
The truth does set us free, and gives us the peace that we need to live without fear. Any freedom which falls short of this goal in a day and time when so many people live their lives in fear is not freedom at all, but bondage.
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
BEYOND
I’m asking you to break my heart,
To shatter it and tear apart
The hardened fibers
Wound up tight
Around a core
That hides in fright
Of knowing what it may yet be
Uncovered and entirely free
To give and one day to receive
The love that you’ve designed for me
Apart from what I have believed
Or anything I can conceive –
That ministers in midst of grief
So burdensome and very deep
The soul would yearn for death to see
The face of heaven
Beyond flesh’s need.
KDC 2/08
To shatter it and tear apart
The hardened fibers
Wound up tight
Around a core
That hides in fright
Of knowing what it may yet be
Uncovered and entirely free
To give and one day to receive
The love that you’ve designed for me
Apart from what I have believed
Or anything I can conceive –
That ministers in midst of grief
So burdensome and very deep
The soul would yearn for death to see
The face of heaven
Beyond flesh’s need.
KDC 2/08
Monday, February 4, 2008
A Recent Poem
THE THORN
This is the thorn
That was given to me
To pierce the lie of vanity
And keep me searching day by day
To find the truth, the life, the way.
The goal is not to rid me of
This twisted way of viewing love,
Instead to make me humble as
The one who keeps me coming back
To find the straight and narrow path.
KDC 12/07
This is the thorn
That was given to me
To pierce the lie of vanity
And keep me searching day by day
To find the truth, the life, the way.
The goal is not to rid me of
This twisted way of viewing love,
Instead to make me humble as
The one who keeps me coming back
To find the straight and narrow path.
KDC 12/07
REMORSE
REMORSE
It feels like being punished
Just for being honest,
As if it wasn’t hard enough
Just to have the courage
To own the sin that I let in,
The sin that badly hurt us,
And beg to be forgiven
(Though I know I don’t deserve it)
So that nothing will be hidden
From the One who won’t desert us
When we’re reaching out for others
Who insist that they can’t learn us
And cringing from successive blows,
The repercussions still unknown,
While consequence brings pain that wasn’t worth it.
KDC 9/07
It feels like being punished
Just for being honest,
As if it wasn’t hard enough
Just to have the courage
To own the sin that I let in,
The sin that badly hurt us,
And beg to be forgiven
(Though I know I don’t deserve it)
So that nothing will be hidden
From the One who won’t desert us
When we’re reaching out for others
Who insist that they can’t learn us
And cringing from successive blows,
The repercussions still unknown,
While consequence brings pain that wasn’t worth it.
KDC 9/07
Something's Missing
Something’s Missing
My heart is heavy in my chest
And though I try my very best
My mind won’t give your face a rest
From suffering these long affects.
I sometimes think I can’t believe
That you have really had to leave
This awesome synchronicity
And how it made our lives complete.
The sadness surely once will go,
Retiring to the ground like snow
And settling deep within, I know,
Although the change in time is slow.
This distance doesn’t mean a thing
To us who to each other cling
For something that our soul’s can bring,
The wind beneath another’s wings.
KDC
2/07
My heart is heavy in my chest
And though I try my very best
My mind won’t give your face a rest
From suffering these long affects.
I sometimes think I can’t believe
That you have really had to leave
This awesome synchronicity
And how it made our lives complete.
The sadness surely once will go,
Retiring to the ground like snow
And settling deep within, I know,
Although the change in time is slow.
This distance doesn’t mean a thing
To us who to each other cling
For something that our soul’s can bring,
The wind beneath another’s wings.
KDC
2/07
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